Welcome to the 7th Part of our Core Christian Parenting Fundamentals Series!  I would encourage you to read the first 6 if you haven’t had a chance yet!

Today we are talking more about expectations and letting our children be our spiritual thermometers as parents.  Do the expectations our children feel and sense match up with what our heart desire really is for our kids?

If we are preaching the scriptures and righteous living in our expectations of our kids and then focusing too much on outward appearance( how they look and dress, how they act and their behavior) could it be possible that we are in sin?

Why are we in sin if we focus on these outward things?

I am not saying that having a standard of dress (modesty- or whatever) is bad and sinful, it’s what our focus is.

We are in sin as parents because we could be potentially training and raising pharisees.  We need our minds to be transformed and renewed from the patterns of this world.  As parents, we need to change how we view bad behavior. Instead of “being embarrassed,” we need to see that there is a spiritual battle raging around our child.  They are being tempted, just as we all are.  Tempted to sin, to be selfish, and to be focused on themselves. We need to get involved in the battle, teach them to recognize the battle for what it is.

Then teach the power of prayer and choices; and then help them to make the right choices.  If and when they sin, because they will, we need to get in the mess of sin, deal with it and pursue righteous living beside our children… then their behavior will be the out~pour of their transformed hearts, rather than trying to please us parents. Instead it will be the fruit that comes from utilizing what they have learned.  Learning to rely on the power of God to help them overcome temptation at a young age.  Then when they grow older it will hopefully, be a muscle they have been exercising, and a habit that becomes a reaction to sin.

This is a process, and each child is at a different place in this sanctifying process.  All of us parents are on a different path in this process as well.  We just need to allow our children to be our spiritual thermometers sometimes!

Hearing from them what their perspective is on what we are constantly focused on is so healthy… it can be painful if you aren’t ready for truth, but so healthy!

Focuses can be generational, what will your children focus on as parents?

May your relationships with your children grow as you proactively seek to get in the mess of sin and fight it with your children.

In the Mess of Life,